I Get Some Really Weird Looks When I Am Out with My Kids

I get some weird looks when I am out with my kids.

1) “The Triangular Stare”: This is a term I have read about in my adoption books. It means the person looks from me to my kid to my husband, trying to figure out who belongs to who in this trans-racial family. I don’t like it and I am still working on comebacks. I don’t mind curiousity and sharing and maybe even educating people, but I don’t necessarily want to have to do so in front of my child.

photo courtesy of http://www.sethrobertsphotography.com

2) “The Stroller Stare”: When I am out with my 3 children in a triple stroller, the stroller gets all the attention and no one seems to notice I have twins. I get a comment every few feet, and lots of whispers. Cool stroller trumps cute babies.


3) “The Twins Stare”: When I am out with my babies in merely my double stroller, and R is home with Dad, people (mostly women) stare at my babies with this look of drugged euphoria on their faces and say kind things like “bless your heart”. If only they knew I had THREE babies in diapers, their hearts might explode.


4) The “She-Must-Be-The-Nanny” Non-Stare: When I go mall-walking, my set-up is a 3-year-old and a baby in my double stroller, and I wear one baby in a front pack. With this arrangement, no one seems to stop me or say anything.

What I really want to say to all these people is: “We spent eight years hoping and praying for children. We worked as hard as we could and saved as much as we could. We did mountains of paperwork and hundreds (thousands?) of injections. We built this family from the ground up. It may look a little weird, and I may look and sound like a zombie, but I love it. Thank you for all your kind words, and, to the rest of you, I hear your under-your-breath comments.”


5 thoughts on “I Get Some Really Weird Looks When I Am Out with My Kids

  1. It amazes me how many people know nothing of infertility or adoption. And for what it’s worth: your babies are the most adorable things. 🙂


  2. HOLY COW!! We waited (tried!) for 8 years as well!! We did EVERYTHING too and then found an egg donor that could be my twin. We have one that is 21months and just had fraternal TWINS (the variety pack – boy/girl) 6 weeks ago!! We are RIGHT there with you girl!! We are looking at getting the Valco stroller and this just helped us decide. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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