Earlier this year, the editors of book in progress about multiples found my blog and contacted me. They asked me to write an honest-to-goodness book review for them. I was so flattered! I quickly agreed to do the review, but to be honest, I was a bit skeptical about agreeing to review a book that I had not yet read. What if I hated it? (In case you haven’t noticed, I’m a bit
snobby selective about books and writing in general – despite the fact that the twins have given me swiss-cheese holes in my brain. Maybe I’m just a jerk!) Well, when I started reading, I breathed a sigh of relief: the book was good. As I continued to read, I realized the book was really good. By the end, I was wishing I had written the book myself. I am honored that I can attach my name to this truly good book. Thank you to the editors for giving me the chance to preview this book and share my opinion. Below is my full review of “Multiples Illuminated”.
“Multiples Illuminated: A Collection of Stories and Advice from Parents of Twins, Triplets, and More” is exactly the book that all parents of multiples – from pregnancy onward – need in their libraries. A combination of anthologies and advice, this book fills a huge gap in the literary world. Whether you are hugely and painfully pregnant with twins (or more!), or you are completely catatonic from keeping up with the needs of newborn multiples, or you feel like your brain is a ping pong ball with an army of small people in your house, this book is for you!
“Multiples Illuminated” was exactly the book I needed when I was expecting my twins. Unfortunately, the pregnancy books I did manage to find back then usually gave super unhelpful tips like, “Don’t do cocaine.” (Um, yeah, I guess I’m all set.) I’m just an “Okayest Mom” – I didn’t need anything bossy or overly optimistic. I just wanted something real. What I needed was a book like this one – a book that would have told me how ridiculous it would be when I was nursing two babies and one needed to unlatch to burp. (In case you’re wondering, you can turn yourself into a mother cat and lift a baby by the pajamas with your teeth. Just kidding. Kind of.) I needed a book that would have told me the harsh truth: I would indeed feel like “a sedated mental patient” sometimes. Or most of the time.
I am not the only parent of multiples who doesn’t remember much of anything about the first year. I had two-year-old son with special needs and newborn twin sons. I had three children in diapers – and I was running on fumes. I needed “Multiples Illuminated” then, but I actually feel a little lucky that I do have this book now. I’m still in the trenches, but now I know I’m not alone (or crazy!).
Even though my twin boys are now three years old, “Multiples Illuminated” has quickly earned a place in my heart as a personal resource. This book has restored my faith in my own sanity during potty training and other more-than-twice-as-hard tasks. I even choked back tears of relief while reading a few chapters: other parents of multiples have experienced situations and feelings that I thought were unique to me. I felt so much less alone when I read that other parents have been so stressed that they have almost had to leave their body to view the insanity and chaos from above; others have also missed their spouses and felt lonely because one of them always had a baby in their arms; other parents have struggled to read picture books simultaneously to twins; other parents have felt that all-consuming guilt when they can only meet the needs of one twin at a time. Being a parent of multiples can be heart-wrenching, overwhelming, sometimes just okay, and sometimes so very delicious. Thank you to the contributors and editors of “Multiples Illuminated” for telling the brutal yet beautiful truths about being a parent of multiples.